Hi All, Just have a few minutes to post this morning, off to the doctor for an annual checkup. I sure hope that all the stress of this past year hasn't caused any damage .
TL, I especially like what you said here:
Quote: That's why I think it's so necessary to let go of the past. Because of our history with our spouses we have all the expectations for reassurance, etc. But the WAS can't give that cause they don't have it. THEY BAILED ON US! Right or wrong, they may not have much to give anymore, but if they're WILLING to build something new, if we're willing to let go of the past once it's been sufficiently dealt with, then it's all about that. GH rightly points out that in the end, assuming our WAS are willing to recommit 100% and do their part, it's going to be our game to lose. We either just get over it or we don't
I realize it is going to take time for my H to rekindle feelings for me. I need to lower my expectations. If he doesn't have it to give, then he just can't give it.
I have to let go of my feelings of entitlement. I feel like I must have an apology (which I hope someday to get), H must get on his knees and beg my forgiveness and do everything in his power to prove to me that the A is over. And truth be told he really is doing so much. For one, he now comes straight home from work and if I am not here he calls me to let me know he is home. He is back to doing things around the house that he neglected to do while having the A. He is happy doing things with my extended family. These are all positive things, yet I am so selfish that it is never enough for me. Bad Mama! It's like I keep setting him up to fail when actually I should be grateful for all that he is doing. So the affection part is lacking, I believe in time it will get there as long as I am patient.
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