EA, being "friends" with OW, and Boundaries

[NikB]

Hi Stilltryin - thanks for the post! Yes, I am really working on editing myself and biting my tongue before I say anything about the OW. I definitely need to focus more on the GAL side of things - I am almost obsessed right now with "fixing" the R, and I know that's not healthy.

I do have a lot of hope on that 6-7 month mark coming up too, and the fact that he seems to be getting kind of tired of dealing with her. Although he went there last night for dinner while I was at the concert...<sigh>... so I can't get my hopes up too high. It's frustrating that every GAL activity I can think of means being out of the house, and every time I'm out for an evening he sees it as a perfect night to go spend time w/her (but of course he's just "having dinner at a friend's house, what's the big deal?" ugh).

Thanks for the suggestion/sharing on your experience with your mom. She managed to keep from bashing anyone (H or my dad) last night, so that was good. I'll see if I can get her to read the book too - good idea. I think I'm going to avoid telling any other friends or family unless it gets to a point where we really have to. It's just not helpful!!

Tomorrow's our first counseling session - I am so nervous but boy do I hope it goes OK. She was recommended by Michele Weiner Davis via the DB site, so I hope she's good. I told her that H was pretty reluctant to go, and she said her approach is usually really appealing to men because she's very goal oriented. I hope so. We really need some extra help right now!