It has been nearly six months since the bomb...three years into this journey. In stepping back and looking at it from my current perspective, time has flown, and I am a completely new person. At least in my own eyes. I feel free. I am my own woman, no longer defined by my relationship, career, family. Each of these things has given me wonderful experiences, lessons, joy, agony. But they are not who I am.
I am just me. I am beautiful and happy and peaceful. I am fun to be with, in a quiet kind of way. I am healthy. I am intelligent and perceptive. I am creative and elegant. I am soft spoken. I am driven. I am successful. I am confident and capable. I am grateful. I am sensual and loving and nurturing.
The last few weeks have proved a turning point in this process for me. I am improving my thought-control skills every day, choosing to direct my emotions in positive directions, keeping my expectations low, letting fear roll off my back and out of my line of sight.
Obviously, there is much to be resolved in my M. But the ball is in H's court now. No more pursuing. If H wants to be here, he'll be here. If not, there's nothing I can do about that. But I can choose whether to let it bother me or not. Therein lies my power. Bring on the new year.
