your trust has been shattered so it is understandable, for months I kept waiting for "the other shoe" to drop, for him to tell me he really didn't see us together anymore, etct etc. My H also had that fear, that we've both slipped into old patterns, it is a very fragile state, the first months together.
Your heart is learning to trust again, you've been hurt and that's why you feel like this isnt' going to work or why would you believe a word he says. Fear will ruin all if you let it, take a deep breath and understand that it took a lot for him to come to you and he's actually willing to talk about it (I only got infor about the A thought arguments)
The past is gone, close that door already, nothing good will come out of rehashing old hurts. It's like the step of faith that Indiany Jones gave on "the last crusade", he couldnt' see the bridge, but he knew it was there, he just lifted his foot and went forward.
Begin the day w/a positive state of mind, reclaim this day for you and your H, please get this book, it is excellent for learning how to heal when you dont' think you'll ever get over the hurt or begin to trust, it is called "Healing the hurt in your marriage", you need to fill your mind w/positive messages.
It doesn't feel like it now but trust me, it can get better, don't let fear ruin what could be a better M than before, I feel like I'm closer to my H than before, I wish the A would've never happened, but in honesty our M was just not doing well way before the A.
...but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
piecing after separation
