Quote: In conclusion, you are probably unconsciously turning your H off because you are attaching too much chocolate to your pretzel for his taste. It might be the case that he really does have deep issues with intimacy overall in which case he will run from chocolate wherever he finds it. However, if it is true in your situation, as it is true in mine, that when you sit down and start knitting, your H says "What are you knitting?" and you say "A scarf to go with my jacket." he then says mock plaintively " Aren't you going to knit anything for me?" the problem isn't an overall lack of desire for intimacy but a specific lack of ability or lack of preference for intimacy mixed with sex.
So my advice to you is serve pretzels in the bedroom and chocolate in the family room and try not to mix them up and be patient and self-aware if it takes your H a while to clue into the fact that you've made a change in the menu. Also, you may need to cut down on the amount of both chocolate and pretzels you are serving for a while in order to restore some relationship equilibrium but keep serving the fruits and vegetables and protein.
