Should I or should I not get involved..7 mos apart

[Astimegoeson]

I'm 45, WAW 43, S13 & S6
Married 8 years, I've know her since she was 16 years old.

7/05 - W drops bomb.. ILYBNILWY, need space, ect, ect,
12/05 - Moved out.
6/06 - Found out WAW was having EA with prison inmate since 5/05.. visits/letters/phone calls. om is still in prison on 2 ND degree murder charges. She was engaged to him 15 years ago before he committed crime and went to prison. He got 15 years to life. Shot a man in a heated argument. She said she was over him, but I guess not.
8/06 - Listed house for sale. Still waiting on buyer.

Mutual agreement to sell off assets and split proceeds before filing for dissolution.

I went through the same range of emotions that most here have gone through. I wanted to save my marriage and did all the wrong things trying, begged, pleaded, cried, etc.

When what I was doing didn't work, I started reading and researching. Started to evaluate my own part in all of this. Started to work on improving myself in many areas of my life and found out some things about myself I didn't know. Than, I started to question my own motives for wanting my W back. I still am questioning my motives for wanting her back and am starting to concentrate more on my self and kids. What do I want out of life? What's held me back from doing the things I want to do? How do I get to where I want to go? A lot of self discovery.

The OM came up for parole and was denied just recently. She is devastated and is even flakier than she was before. I would take my old W back, but not this person she is now.

I'm strongly in the detaching camp and come here occasionally to communicate with others in my same circumstances. It helps with the healing and my understanding.