Well can't offer you much advice but just wanted to write you in support. Sorry you find yourself here and in this situation. My situation is very similar so I know what you are going through. Personally I confronted my W but it did little good and probably moved us closer to S and D.
At first I tried to believe the W...trust her again...but quickly found that in this situation you may think you know your W but do not believe a word she is saying because they are a different person and will lie without conscious. That was and is the most difficult thing for me...the bold faced lies...it was one thing to discover the affair...everyone makes mistakes...but then to look me in the eyes and lie over and over again...that is what really hurt.
I guess I am interested in what others say in your situation. When the spouse is on their walk away trip to fantasy land it seems there is little you can do stop it...seems only possible to get out of the way and give them space while they go on their ride...the advice you will likely get is to work on yourself...don't pressure your W...do 180s...get a life...no relationship talk...etc...and just hope she snaps out of it and decides to come back to you...while all of that seems nice, it is almost impossible to execute while the love of your life is running out of your life...I wish you luck and strength...you are in for some trying times.
"Friendship is like peeing your pants: everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth."
