I already have this book on order, Fran. It sounds right up my alley. My bf is incredibly good-looking, has a gorgeous singing voice, projects an intensely masculine persona, and, as a salesman, is very personable and charming. BUT his finances are a mess, he flunked out of college due to alcohol and drugs, and has a criminal record. So he started out the one-down.
I started out the one-up. I am financially okay (thanks to my late H), have a Master's degree, and have been a successful free-lancer with something of a local reputation in my field for almost 20 years. As for looks, I'm on the positive side of average, but nothing like the star quality that he has.
When we first met, as I said, I was the one-up, particularly sexually-- very open, playful, flirtatious-- I was very experienced and had some pretty Out There expectations for my next sexual partner. I thought, mostly because he was so hot looking, that I had met my match (finally). Turns out he has ED, due to physical and emotional causes, and was very sexually inexperienced (married 25 years, and as he confessed in the C's office a couple of weeks ago: "strictly missionary position" the whole time). He is not the LEAST bit sexually adventurous-- some of that is due to being sexually molested by his mom when he was a kid, some of it due to not having had sex sober EVER until two years ago, and some of it due to just lack of experience.
And I have become VERY resentful and very one-down. This has led to a complete lack of interest in sex on my part, in spite of the fact that he is starting to come out of his shell a bit.
Anyway, not to go on and on... but this book seems to address many of my/our issues, and I'm looking forward to reading it.
