CM;

I read through your thread and about half of the posts.
You are getting good advice from a lot of people.

However, there are two things that bother me, really
bother me.

1. The degrading name you called your W. I know that you
didn't mean to say that, but you did. Whatever would posess you to think that, much less say it? The woman
that you asked to marry you, the woman that you love so
much and are literally dying to get back, the woman who
bore your children!!
Do you have any idea what that did to your M? Some women
can overlook the name and some cannot. You really hurt
her...bad. Unless you know for a fact that she's sleeping
all over town AND getting paid for it, you need to lose
that piece out of your vocabulary. It's equivalent to
calling an African-American the "N" word. You can apologize from here to eternity, but your W will never
forgive you.

If you need to argue, use the issues only; never, ever,
do you personally attack another person. Argue smart.

2. You and your W need to separate from each other for
about three months. Yes, there are kids and your business
that will keep you connected; but you both need to be in
separate corners, now. You need to start listening to
yourself and finding out what it is that you want.
You need to lay off calling her or OM or even TM.

You are way out of control. You are pushing her out the
door...

My main concern is that I'm not convinced that you even
love her anymore. IMO, I feel that b/c she has the OM,
you feel desparately ignored. Your "gloating" about
how she's going to feel when you do this and that...
really disturbs me. That's not misguided love, that is
something more sinister. There's more to this case than
you're letting us to believe...there's more to this story.

You need to get into some anger management classes; work
closer with a Therapist. There is definitely more that
you haven't told us.

IMO, honestly, I feel you are in love with the idea of love, that you love being married - but, none of it has
anything to do with your W.
The fear of being left behind paralyzes you to move forward. I really don't feel that you love her, it's as
though you depend on her for your existence.

It also seems to me that when she leaves, you will go out
of your way to make her life miserable. Conquer and destroy.

You really need to see a Therapist, to calm down b/c you
are on a self-destruvtive course.

CM - my opinions are my own, they aren't stated to hurt
you...only to help you.

There is a much darker side to you than you let on...
I need to know what that is...