Hey Number lady, you've got your own thread now,eh? Good to see, now all us guys can stop begging you to check out our threads and come directly to the source The thing that stands out for me in what you've said is the inability of the LBS to STOP the emotional upheaval. It's kind of like a sewer backup! We end up spewing all that yukky guk right back into our R, what remains of it. You are right, the S does not want to see pleading, crying, etc. They do not come back because they feel sorry for us and if they do it can only be with huge resentment. Our S's know we love them...so that's that. We know how they feel about the R...and that's that. GH once wrote that we have to realize that our R is dead, it was diseased and died...it's gone. We can either choose to build a new one or move on. Building a new one starts by showing our S's the stuff that they will want to come back to, and not just for them, for us. This tragic episode in my life has introduced me to more amazing things about myself than I ever imagined before this. If I fail in my attempts to revive my M, I will be a far better man than I was before (and I wasn't too damn bad before, just complacent). If we can all just get a handle on the anger and hurt, feel them and move on, our DBing will begin to work its magic. Only then does it stand a chance. My W did what she did because she was not happy and felt she could not be with me. Right or wrong, what is is! I have to live with what is and not cry over what was. P.S. I did do the crying thing early on, don't bother guys!
