Quote: After years of marrige the love MATURES, feelings come and go, love is a DECISION, to consecrate yourself to this one person, to give your all.
Yes, this is exactly how I feel. To H, though, love is a feeling - you either feel it or you don't. And while he wants to come back and try, he's worried that he'll never get that feeling back for me. So...I hope that throughour MC and his individual counseling, he'll come to understand that love isn't all moonlight and roses. Life - even sharing it with someone - is sometimes mundane. But I also need to recognize that he wants romance and a spicy love life...things that I've let slide in the last few years. Hopefully we can meet in the middle.
Quote: Has your H vowed not to contact her?
Yes. He says this is the difficult part for him. I wasn't going to insist on it, as I'd like to see their relationship naturally die away (rather than make me the evil b-tch who forced them to end it), but he says he can't talk to her and work on our marriage at the same time. I'm not deluding myself - I know they'll talk at some point. I just worry about how often and whether it will cause him to leave again. But you're right - I can't worry about that. Just listen to him when he says he's committed to me and work on myself.
