WOW!! I wasn't expecting that. But then i suppose neither were you!
This OP is totally out of order. If she were a real friend to your W she would be encouraging her to seek professional help about the depression and any marital problems. I think she is behaving so selfishly and therefore, cannot be a very nice person - i must admit i would find it highly unlikely that this "friendship" will last.
I think your W is very confused and not thinking rationally at the moment - do you think it's purely due to the depression or could it be some sort of MLC? It sounds like you are doing all the right things - it just makes me mad that we all hang in there, trying to be patient and loving while they convince themselves that they are doing nothing wrong and that the M was over ages ago.
You are being a fantasic dad and role model to your D's so you really are the bigger person and like you said you will always be able to say that you did your best.
