Ok, I called the W and just asked her point blank about the possibility of me being in "male denial" and she gave me an emphatic, "no." I mean, I offered to read whatever she wanted, watch whatever she wanted, go to a sex therapist, anything if I were doing something wrong.

Her verbatim response was, "Everything you do is good, I just never feel horny or attracted to you right now."

So, that's either just how it is and there doesn't seem to really be anything we can do about it, or she's lying. I don't think she's lying.

When we ML, it's usually initiated by her saying something like, "Ok, let's go be happy" or something like that. But she doesn't come on to me, doesn't kiss me or respond to my kissing her (I mean, she kisses me back, but she's clearly not into it the way she'd be if she wanted it).

We ML regularly, and started off scheduling it, but have sort of graduated (?) up to doing it on those nights/times when we're just having a good time together, hoping that will be more natural.


You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. -- Inigo Montoya, 'The Princess Bride'