We haven't started any MC yet, but once we do I'd like to go once every 1-3 months just to help ensure communication is going well and neither my husband and I are ignoring concerns or getting sidetracked. I figure it's a lot cheaper than a divorce and worth the time.

I can understand your concern about this wedding. I've had a similar situation with my husband. He is out of town right now and in the same area where OW lives. Even worse he may have to run into her (she works for the same company, but in another state).

To help me feel more comfortable about this my husband has been calling and texting me a lot, and has said he's going to keep in contact with me throughout and he is coming home as quickly as possible.

Interestingly, the thing that's helping me most with all of this is pulling myself (my ego, my pain) out of this whole thing and trusting him to make the best decision for himself. I believe being with me and the kids is the best thing and I believe he'd be happiest with us, but I have to trust him to make whatever decisions are best for himself (whatever they may be!).

Another thing, the affair did cost him a lot emotionally. I don't think he'd want to go through that again anytime soon. Of course, there are no guarentees, but I can't live my life worrying about every little thing. He could always have an affair at any time with anyone, I don't want to be his parole officer.

There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.