I think what has happened is that you have inadvertantly forced your wife to look at your marriage from the perspective of the one BEING LEFT.
So she sees things from that perspective now and it doesn't look like a bed of roses.
She has gotten what not many people get. The chance to see what she did to YOU. And she has come to appreciate the very things she took for granted when she came to the place where she wanted to end the marriage.
This is very extraordinary and I'd caution you to not suspect it as much as you should be thankful for it.
You know my story so it's pretty dramatic to switch like that AND FOLLOW THROUGH. If it's not genuine, she won't hold up long. It should not take you forever to trust her again. If after several weeks, she still acting this way, you need to be thanking God for the blessing.
As for all the time it took you to "detach"...the damnedest thing I've seen is that there aren't any instructions as to how to "RE-attach".
So you do what everybody else does. You just take it one day at a time.
