Quick recap....when H and I were newly seperated and he kept telling me he hadn't loved me for a long time I recalled the locket I was wearing and had to ask if he loved me when he gave it to me....he said "I don't know"...
Well I removed the locket in tears and told him that I didn't want it back until he could tell me that he loved me....
Fastforward....when he moved back to the area (before moving back with me)he rented an apartment with a guy (lawyer) that I didn't like....he gave me the creeps... well they eventually had a falling out and my H did as he did with me....left everything he owned in the apartment, including my locket....now it has been almost a year....he hasn't paid rent since March because he really couldn't afford the place to begin with but his MLC fantasy wouldn't allow him to reason that far...
Now he won't go get my locket because he says the guy has guns and it mentally unstable....he won't go through the court because he did sign a lease and he is afraid the guy will come after him with all his "legal" guns to get that money...
I was upset....I understood why he couldn't get my locket...but I was very sad....the sentimental value is there for me....because I feel soon that I will hear ILY and that was going to be my token....the return of my cherished locket...now it is gone....and H thought I was trying to make him feel guilty (I wasn't)....I just wanted some sympathy....understanding about my sadness and my loss....all he could say is "I can get another locket."...of course any woman and probably some men (not meant to be sexist just what I have seen) can see that another locket is NOT THAT locket....it CAN'T be replaced
So I cried....he got mad and said I was using guilt to control him....that I wanted him to risk getting shot for my locket....all not true....I just wanted him to understand my loss....that locket meant so much to me.... He wouldn't even give me a hug because he was so angry...so he left me sobbing on my bed and went to work....when he came home I had dinner ready and he ate....we watched some TV and I went to bed....he came in later....
He is emotionally withholding from me....he does this....he just shuts down.....makes me feel worse....and so the cycle goes...
I don't want him to buy me another locket...to me that would be more painful...a reminder always of the one that I lost....I don't want that....but he would do that...I would react negatively....then he would say "You don't ever appreciate the gifts I get for you."....he said that about THAT locket because when he gave it to me we had agreed we couldn't afford to exchange gifts for our anniversary and he went and spent money we didn't have....I was upset about that....not the locket...but he puts things and money in one lump and says I didn't appreciate it....after the shock of the money side wore off I wore my locket often....had pics of him and S in it...I cherished it....and I always will (in my memories)...but I don't want another one
I invited him to breakfast....hoping that we can talk this out and clear the air instead of doing what he prefers and ignoring it....because then I keep inside my bitter feelings and he keeps inside his and that is basically what got us to where we were a few years ago when his MLC came to a peak!....I don't ever want to walk that road again...I WON'T!
