Hoping For A Miracle - New Here

[nodivorceplease]

Lemon-

My H actually tells me the same thing - he has no feelings for me anymore. That hasn't changed in the 2 months he's been gone. When I asked him to go to MC in the beginning, he said no because he didn't think he could put his heart into it. Ouch! All of this is so hurtful. I've given this man so much of myself and now it's not good enough. I also feel like I am on probation. When he comes to visit, I feel like I have to look great and the house has to be spotless. He was very critical of me right before he left so I am self conscious around him. There are moments when I just want to tell him to go straight to hell. I don't know what he wants from me anymore. I have made changes too but they seem to go unnoticed. I just really miss having someone loving me and telling me how wonderful I am. You know?? This fight feels tired and lonely. My 7 yr old is going thru some grieving as well despite my best efforts to keep her spirits up. I feel like I'll never be able to just relax.

Shelly