ToF - Do you have a thread going right now - I saw that you've had a recent identity change, but hadn't seen an independent ToF thread.
Shelly - Happy early b-day to you, too. I have to say that my H, even in the best of times, has never been the best at giving timely, thoughtful gifts, so I have no expectation that I will get anything at all this year. Yes, I agree that it's good that he's agreed to go out on a few "dates", but I don't know if they've really made any difference. I thought we had a good time, but H hasn't said he's enjoyed them, and I wonder if he's just wanting to be able to say, "I tried spending time with you, and I still have no feelings for you."
Journaling: I haven't done very well with my attempt to be more dim the last 2 days. The last 2 nights, H has called late enough that he knew that S3 would be asleep. Both times, we talked mostly about kid issues, some small talk, so I guess that's fine. But, I was clearly enthusiastic about talking to him, and he cut both conversations off abruptly -- like he was sick of talking to me. I should have cut off the conversations first and not seemed so grateful to talk to him. Ugh.
It has been almost 6 months since "the bomb" for me, and I have no reason to believe that anything is different at all. But, I don't want to bring up our sitch/where we stand because I am sure I won't get the answers I want. I hope that H is still thinking about things, but he is very non-confrontational -- if I don't bring (difficult) things up, we generally don't talk about them. So, maybe I am just putting off the inevitable by not bringing up the R/what he is going to do. That's fine for now. But, I can't live like this forever - not knowing where I stand, trying so hard to make him happy all the time . . . Have no idea how he's going to want to handle the holidays (i.e. spending time together as a family and with our extended families) -- I wonder if that will be the impetus for him to make some sort of decision.
Guess I am not doing that well with the PMA.
Well, must go work on some laundry and other chores.
