Scheduling: A Help or a Hindrance?

[toughlover]

Thanks y'all. Kinda feels wierd to post about it, but if it helps I'll keep going.

We've got a couple special restaurants we're hitting regularly...one a small neighborhood cafe we like, and the other a plain ol restaurant that we just like. We're working up to the night or weekend getaways. Tough with two kids and all their activities, but I'm making it happen.

RE-"something different": I know that my wife likes for me to be the dominant one in the BR, and she also likes for someone to make a fuss over her, do something special. Doesn't have to be a big deal, just the fact that I keep an eye on what she likes and do little stuff really speaks to her "love language." She's really gotten into pink things, so one day (not thinking I was doing anything major) I stopped at the bookstore and bought her a pink binder (she's in a pretty intense Bible study right now and has been using a red binder for her worksheets) and some pink mechanical pencils (I noticed she really liked using my mechanical pencils). Well SHE FLIPPED OUT!

So a few days a week, usually on our "happy" days, I bring her something pink, or at least something she really likes and uses wrapped in pink, and say "happy pink day" heh. She sings in church and uses a lot of cough drops when her throat gets scratchy, so sometimes it's just pink cough drops.

One day I noticed her "everyday undies" had seen better days so I showed up at lunchtime with a few packs of plain ol' cotton Hanes panties, and she flipped out again.

So, there's the expectation of the day/time for sex, whatever, but we've turned it somehow into these mini-festivals that are just sort of fun and relaxed and humorous...and a test to see how creative I can be.

And she prefers the man to be the pursuer, which has been an issue lately since, having been cheated on, my confidence was shot, but she also needs to respect the person doing the pursuing which, again, adultery is the ultimate lack of respect. Fortunately, our MC (we don't go much anymore) had my W focusing on showing me respect and observing what I do that is worthy of her respect, and that seems to be helping a lot.

So somehow all this playful "gifting" and whatnot, along with the MC, seems to be helping solve a lot of those problems.

I can't believe it was ever this simple. I'd have been doing stuff like this from day 1.