What happens first, the drop in desire, or the fall off of attention from the man? My guess is that in most cases, it is the fall off in desire.
In my case, the drop of both desire and attention came when I was pregnant with my first child. I had some problems in the beginning and could not have intercourse. H never wanted to touch me in any sexual way during my whole pregnancy, and things never really got better.
Quote: I still do all kinds of stuff for my wife and family.
Wow, how wonderful! You do stuff w/o getting any sex as a reward! What a man! This was not so so in my case; I certainly would not presume to speak for anyone else.
Quote: If getting desire was as easy as wining and dining our wives, us guys would be all over that.
Why do you assume that you ALL try that? My H didn't. Oh, unless by "wining" you mean getting me drunk. In any case, you missed the point here: wining and dining is not the answer. There's a whole lot more, which I know has been discussed at length on this bb. I don't post here, but I do read.
Quote: Men have NOTHING to do with ANY of them.
Again, I can only speak from my own experience, but here are some of my reasons:
1. Being raped at age 5 by A MAN
2. My father, a MAN, making inappropriate comments about my body, as well as remarks that contributed to my poor body image.
3. Being raped again at age 21, by a MAN.
4. Being told by my husband, a MAN, that he likes women with more meat on them, despite that fact that I've always looked the way I do.
5. Being treated like an object during sex with my H, still a MAN, who would tell me change to this or that position, regardless of what I wanted to do, and didn't use loving words with me.
I will stop here. Surprisingly, I'm not a man-hater. I do not know your history with your wife, but you are certainly making some inflammatory and very general statements here based, it seems, on nothing but your own opinion.
Nicola
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
