Quote: Do you think that most people seek to alleviate their uncomfortable feelings?
Yes. I think it is a normal biological response to pursue pleasure and avoid pain. THOUSANDS of studies on this one.
Quote: Do you think that your new guy does the same?
Yes. We've talked a lot about it.
Quote: Do you think that, on the whole, that people say what's on their minds, without feeling terror?
It depends. Typically in areas where I am lacking confidence, speaking on 'it' makes me feel radically uncomfortable. Speaking about things that make me feel exposed, vulnerable, potential shame or embarassement... all cause me feelings of extreme unease.
Quote: Do you know anyone who feelings are congruent with their actions?
I didn't say 'feelings being congruent with actions.' I said, are my words congruent with my actions. Big dif. Can I honestly convey my feelings even if those feelings may make another uncomfortable, or hurt their feelings? Tough one. But if I SAY I am an honest, non-judgemental person, yet I do not honestly convey my feelings, my words are not congruent with my actions. That doesn't mean I get to dump on others for the sake of honestly expressing myself. But if not expressing myself honestly is causing or contributing to a problem... and I'm NOT doing so, yet I've claimed to be this... I am not acting with integrity. You see?
Quote: Is there any way to know that a person is acting with integrity?
I think you begin to know over time... especially when you see the other person taking risks themselves... or not... depends on the type of relationship... friendship/colleague/acquaintaince/community leader/spouse
Quote: Hope you don't mind all these questions. You have an intrinsic understanding of my sitch that I haven't found anywhere else.
Sorry for not emailing... been really busy... I will. Be patient with me.
