A lot of focus in relationship problems seems to be on “intimacy” A search for it, avoidance of it, how to deepen it and how important it is to a relationship. While I will agree that it is important I think there has been too much focus on it for myself.
To me intimacy can be achieved just sitting quietly with a book while my wife watches TV it’s not a big deep eye gazing dive into each other’s souls but it is a sense of belonging.
We have been sold a fantasy that intimacy and communication will be a panacea for all that ails a relationship. Intimacy doesn’t always feel good and sometimes communication will do nothing more than point out opposite points of view.
I used to think that my wife and I had intimacy problems. My view has now changed, we have plenty of intimacy and always have. It is the desire for eroticism that I struggle with.
