Yes, this is my current problem. I know it must sound so weird, but I can look back through my life and see that I've done this before.
Lately I've started telling my husband that it's obvious he loves OW because they corresponded for so long and he should leave me and go to her. I am (realistically or unrealistically) making their relationship out to be this incredible love affair and that they belong together. I've even told my husband that I'm the "rebound" and he only thinks he wants to be with me.
Am I nuts!!!!!??? What is wrong with me? I think I must be doing this because I'm so afraid of going through all this again that I'm just gong to create the problem, or drive him away, so I don't have to worry about it.
I think some of this may be something in me or a problem from childhood. Maybe I may have abandonment issues because when my parents divorced my dad basically left from my life (age 9).
When I was a teen and young woman, if any boyfriend I had expressed interest in someone else I would immediately end the relationship (it just wouldn't be for me). I think I have this fantasy of a completely monogomous relationship of mutual friendship, love, fidelity and always being there for each other until death.
Ironically, here I am married to someone with a pattern of infidelity and leaving the relationship. Gosh, this is just getting too complex!!! And I'm probably overanalysizing the whole situation as usual.
Has anyone else here gone through this type of thing??? Any suggestions on how to handle it? (besides a labotomy).
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
