I was thinking about the other night and remembered this. Before the trip we had had some conflict over bringing a business associate. W had strongly pointed out that he might be a problem in that he certainly wouldn't understand and might really blow the meeting with our new Buddhist friends. Eventually she won out and we asked him not to go. This was a very touchy situation.

As we were eating dinner I had said that it was really a good thing we didn't bring him it would have been disastrous if w had and I thanked her for her "persistence" in convincing me. She said "Thank you for describing it that way"

I hadn't thought about this as in any way important until today but maybe there was some importance to it considering our last fight was about her making decisions. She has felt excluded from decisions for some time and I had told her that yes I realized I was excluding her from decisions because her standard answer was to shoot me down. I had had years of negative conditioning.

So there may have been some importance there.

I still can't figure why she turned a little cold on Monday. Only thing I can figure is she percieved some of our discussions in the car as me being a know it all and proving my point. I wasn't but I've found that often times her perception of my meaning is way off from my actual meaning. Preconcieved notions and a negative self image tend to lend to this.

So I think I'll go slightly dark for a few days. A little experiment.

We've got an event in Nov that is a romantic black tie event. I sure would like to be in by then.

Gnu Xue


50-60% of marriages are successful
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