That is downright awesome stuff....and a huge revelation for any DB'r so take note.
Neediness and self doubt are implicitly draining on any relationship - they disguise themselves as jealousy and anger. When we are able to put it to an end, look inward for our happiness and THEN start projecting it outward, what huge steps we take. We increase our attractiveness and we're able to stand tall. Proud. As we should be BTW, we're trying to save something important here...
And you are right - framed the right way, taking care of ourselves is precisely loving. Good observation on society and M - it comes from a place of need - "I need to be married" - heard that one before. Pooh. I PREFER to be married and by bringing the best *ME* the the R that I can, I become that much more able to give love freely - without expectation and neediness. I'm here because I want to be here.
That becomes a huge change in perspective. This might be why Michelle believes that it only takes one person to save an M. I know as W and I make our way through space, we have started more so talking in terms of wants - what we want for our kids, ourselves (individually) and for our M. We need little else. And a long way from the "I need" conversations we were having 14 months ago when the bomb was dropped....
Good stuff Xue, you're onto something....not easy stuff - turning a blind eye when WAW was off doing her thing with the OM, and whatever was the hardest thing I have ever done but ONCE I started looking forward at all the *NEW* opportunities that were in front of me, I became renewed.
Sven
Never sacrifice the great for the good. Sometimes the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair.
