I know I haven't given you a chance to respond yet, but I have one more concern that is eating away at me about going dark. I've seen this issue come up on other threads "read my attempts at detachment as not caring". I am so afraid that my H will see it that way. I have been totally dark for a week, and the last contact was a simple, short FYI call.
I am about 95% certain that this is the feeling that my H will get, that I do no longer care, that his family was right all along (and they will definitely tell him that), and that leaving was the right thing to do. The other 5% says, yes, but this is an Alien we are talking about - who knows. He did say in our last conversation that he also feels it's important for us to become friends and I said that's hard when you treat me like a criminal and avoid me like the plague - he just said yeah, and then I politely ended the call. It was the best conversation we'd had in a month.
I thought about sending him the section of DR about the "beginner's mind" and a short article on SBT tomorrow as food for thought for the weekend. Just a quick e-mail stating that you know I want to save our marriage, I am willing to change, this is something I think is worth while to look at, please read it over with an open mind and consider it. No pressure. No other OR mention.
I could really use some guidance on this before I make that decision.
THank you,
Shawn
ps - any plans on any future seminars in the Phoenix area?
