glad to see Ian is here as he is wise and knows what the heck "manly" means, or at least I think he does. As an outspoken woman considered to have a strong personality, i chose a H with a strong personality as well. He challenged me and was not threatened by my intelligence. But I didn't choose my kind, gentle other boyfriend altough we rarely fought. Something was missing. I chose H b/c I wanted to feel safe/protected, and like the female of the species....don't tell my feminist friends, please. We've had conflicts galore, and problems, or I wouldn't be here. But we've also had 25 years of a M that has had a lot of passion in it, and is turning around from the edge of the cliff anyhow.
Just saying that when a woman says she wants to feel strength from her H, she MEANS it...and physical desire is one sign, as is passion, and setting boundaries....I don't know how you could think the M was fine without sex for so long and she MUST have felt soooo undesired...seriously. I know it's more complicated, but then again, why is it so complex? We want to feel wanted, in more ways than one, but DEFINITELY sexually.
the good news is that she even bothered to tell you what she needed from you. the bad news is that you seem to have taken a long time to react to those expressed needs of hers...I'm sorry you are in so much pain,
but Lose the Ghandi approach if she's telling you what she is telling you...And this does NOT mean to be a jerk, as you've also read here.
Surely, IAN--Someone Male out there---explain as only a man can, the difference between being an as----- in the name of masculinity, and being a "MAN".... it isn't that extreme, and it isn't really about power to me.
L, your wife wants you to be Her man, show her how much that matters to you by figuring out what that means, or ask her for examples, unless that seems too UNmanly. DO what it takes, and I'm sending good thoughts/prayers your way.
good luck, j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
