Wow, it is great to be so validated by you all - the support is wonderful. Your insight on fighting = standing up for myself feels right - I try to disagree humorously now -
It is odd to be home again, for a few days now, nearly every night we spend time together talking. Tonight we watched the first half of "49 up". I don't know if you've seen the earlier ones, but it is the latest installment in a series of films following people's lives every 7 years (so the earlier ones are 7 up, 14 up, 21 up...). The latest one is relevant to our sitch - it interviews people who are now 49 - many have been divorced, or had hard times in their marriages, but a surprisingly large number are somehow satisfied. It was painful to hear of all the divorces and to expose that nerve, but the possiblity of actually finding happiness and the power of sticking through hard times in marriage was good to hear. It was a strange passive discussion between my W and myself of sorts - but a 'date' nonetheless (we must get something more entertaining next time)
Our talks the days before were good too - nothing on 'issues', but about the Christmas party, the kids, films, a little bit about my wife's work, odds and ends of all sorts. Maybe just spending time together is what it is all about?
Anyway, things are not bad now - still no intimacy - but I am somehow moderately contented in spite of it - hope she feels the same -
Friday's date will probably be just a movie and dinner nearby - not the restaurant and hotel in Stockholm - want to keep it light and we have a party for 45 (!) on Sunday evening - lots of cooking and cleaning to do !
Most obliged and grateful to you all -
Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
