Sorry for the tardy reply - busy weekend - the idea is the carrot and stick theory - with the stick only used if needed. I plan on being positive, divorcebusting, for a few months and watching the responses, and then, if really needed, having a serious talk (the stick). February next year is three years of no physical contact, near Valentine's, and also when she will presumably be putting seeds in indoors to germinate for next summer (a good indication of if there is a future), so that might be a possible time.
Hopefully she will see that there is good in our marriage (the carrot) and the emotional pipecleaning will have a positive flavor also. Not sure if things really work that way -
We are friendily talking, her body language is softening very occasionally (not so much crossed arms body blocking when she is in the same room, often the kitchen, with me)
Baby steps -
First snow maybe Thursday - getting dark earlier and earlier - ugh -
Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
