New questions

[Christa]

Michelle, I have read DB but have not began DR yet. I need some advice, My h and I have been separated for 3 months. There is no anger between the two of us we get along fine. As hard as I am trying he keeps saying he just thinks of me as a friend and maybe that's all we've ever been. I know the latter to be untrue! I don't push him whatsoever, and I never bring up OR. He asked me the other day how I was doing and I told him I was okay but I missed him and still loved him. It seems that others on the board go from not hearing from their spose or from the WAS being awful to them to being friends. What do I do? We never hit rock bottom in that sense. He says their isn't anyone else and hasn't been looking, but if things continue as they are, he will. What to do? He seems to be satisfied as friends only. We have been married for 8 years with 3 kids under the age of 7.


Wow, I feel like I am looking in the mirror! I would like to hear from someone who has been in our shoes and is seeing improvements. I need something to hope for!


When h and I were still together and before I began changing myself, I had a no care attitude. I rejected my husband , I had a lot of anger towards him, I told myself many times that when our kids were older; I was going to leave. I thought about life with someone else, wondered what it would be like, etc. I never dated anyone else and began to question my marriage. I realized later that I truly love my husband and that he and I were not a mistake to be together and began changing my attitude. Now we are separated, I guess my changes weren't quick enough. So my question is, If I am to stop pursuing my h (which I have done months ago) how can I put my 180 into practice? For me a 180 would be to show that I do care, give him compliments, be more physical with him, show him more respect and understanding. How can I do those things, wouldn't that be pursuing him or pushing him? What can I do? We are friends, but I want to move from that (forward of course).