I was about to move to the other bedroom, was getting to feel like nothing much is going to change. I did some GAL activities but they didn't solve any problems for me.
The sex part of the R is going down hill. I put in a new leaded, oval glass window door that BB has been wanting for 2 years. Nothing wrong with the old door but I got tired of the talk about the door and thought if she wants something that bad, why not do it.
Door's in now BB is still talking about the patio-home she wants. She is talking like we will be cripples in a couple of years and will have to have everything on one floor and won't be able to do yard work. I guess that line of thinking goes along with reading the obituaries first thing almost everyday. Maybe i better not try to psychoanalyze anyone. I can't do a good job on myself, so why should I expect to know how anyone else thinks.
Short version, I made a MC appointment and BB said she will go.
Her reason for going so far are:
Too much inventory in the basement and garage.
Too many cars.
She is too old for sex.
So I have some things to go on and work with.
My reasons for going:
I feel like we aren't going the same direction.
There is too much distance in the R.
We don't share common goals and very few interests.
Sometimes I wonder if we are just making each other unhappy.
I am trying not to post very often as I don't know where things are going in our R.
I am reading Snarch's "Resurrecting Sex" why, I don't know why, as more and more clues point to BB wanting to and needing to end our sexual R. Oh well, I am getting some self-esteem tips from the book so I will finish it.
I have been reading cobra's new thread and thinking about his comment, how few poster's R's have improved. If this book stuff is so good, why are we still here. Nothing against books BTW, it is that maybe we don't push hard enough with in the R. Like Snarch, said, wanting to stay in a comfort zone at the expense of growth.
I read two of Sarno's books about pain. some truths, some strange ideas. I am about over my back spasms/pain and working all day now.
