Examine w's response to your actions yourself. Did they make her angery? Did they make her upset with you? If you would have done something different what do you think her reaction would have been?
Could you have done anything different that would have gotten a better response from W? Personally, I'm wondering if you shouldn't move in with her for a short time, or have her move back in with you, so you can administer to her current needs.
More importantly, if you had a good R, what would you have done? Would you have stayed by her side as long as she needed you to, and gone to get her medicine? Or would you have ignored her, or only stayed a little while? Would those things have demonstrated how you feel about W?
DBing is not a trick or temporary technique to fool someone. DBing is about identifying what type of person we want to be, and measuring that person against the needs and desires of our S.
If you haven't called your W's C and described her physical symptoms, I recommend you do that ASAP. If her counsellor is unable to be of any help, contact W's doctor. Depending on your sitch, you may need to make the call in W's presence, or encourage W to make the call, or make the call and hand her the phone.
This may also be an opportunity for you to take a stand with OP, and answer the phone when he calls and tell him in no uncertain terms the damage he is causing, and by the grace of God he better eliminate himself from your W's life. That you are placing your marriage on the Rock of Christ, and OPs involvement with W is a direct disobedience of God's word, and is already having physical repercussions for W.
