yeah I had a backsliding moment too when i called him 2 months ago and told him how much I missed him and missed my friend and the man I married and i was crying. I couldn't help it. And he said "what do you think I'm going to do run back into your arms right now?" so hateful. then started to tell me he doesn't know why he married me and he only bought the ring b/c he felt like it was what he needed to do. What the %$^!!! i was like oh well thanks! they get so WEIRD on you. It's like "no one put a gun to your head and told you to marry me." He has alot of support from his mother and sister b/c they don't like me b/c I don't "fit" in with the family and they are encouraging him to do this. So he has LOTS of support. Oh the new rumor of why he is divorcing me..or the reason that he is giving people is "I beat him up." I am 5'2 and a 100 lbs and he is 6'0 and 180 lbs and I beat him up!!! I thought he has LOST his MIND!!! I slapped him one time in May when he told me he wasn't going to work on the marriage and he wanted out and I slapped him....so he has taken that and told everybody that I beat him!! I think people are not given him sympathy like he wanted since he has been telling them he is divorcing me b/c "I wouldn't fish and hunt, ride horses, go to the lakehouse or do anything with him". I think people are looking at him like what?? So now he is using that i beat him. Do you think a judge is going to believe that?? ha. He has really lost it!!!
It makes you wonder....how did I not see this when I dated him?? Where was this crazy person hiding??
but I'm doing ok...not great...but I'm leaning on the Lord ALOT...he has gotten me through this. really he has. I pray alot and read the Bible more and lean on him. I know he has something good in store for me...and I think if it's meant to be for my H and I to get back together it will happen...if not then it never was meant to be. And now I'm thinking to myself "he must never have loved you and if he can D you then why do you want somebody that doesn't want you?" it's only taken me 5 months to get to that point, but still I would like to atleast talk about reconciling...and then i think ...do i really? Since he is so crazy now and I see the real person?? I don't know. I'm not on any antidepressants...which is great...i've been mourning and grieving and allowing myself to feel the pain so I can be able and move on and I want be mourning a year from now. Some people never grieve and they hide thier pain and then a year comes up and they don't understand why they are still grieving. So make sure you do that and that you don't cover up the pain...feel the pain now and grieve. And lean on the Lord. really get a close relationship to him. Thanks for your help ....maybe I have helped you along the way too.