Golden, ************************************** I am really at an impasse and wondering how folks like "Lonely" and others like me can take any comfort in the long run. Please help, anybody? Thanks. ****************************************
I have been following LAN as I came about the same time (or so it seems). I also sympathize with his situation. However, I view it a bit different from afar. I don't make a habit of posting people anymore if I don't think I have anything to suggest.
My R is in the rebuilding phase. Or is it? From what I have heard from some, it is all a matter of perspective. My W is working hard on her sense of self. Her crisis tossed me into my own. Perhaps she was just the first to crack. Perhaps it was me. It all depends on who's story you listen to.
When I thought my relationship was finished, it was. When I read DB and decided to think otherwise, things began to change. I was lucky in that my W accepted the changes as genuine and also chose to try.
I needed help identifying my contributions to our failing R. I also appreciated the help finding solutions to my torment and my torment of W. The BB and several associates helped me with that.
I have seen progress in LAN's R. His W is now asking for him to help her heal. Yes, it is long time comin. I applaude LAN for his ability to hang in there. Not many have managed as much. I offer him support whenever I can and I pray he can hang in there cus I ultimately see him receiving reward for the sacrifice.
He uses the BB for support and as a sounding board. I understand if your desire for privacy stops you from doing the same. But I think the answer for some, comes from the BB. At least part of it . I think this place brings some comfort during their struggle.
