I too feel stuck. I haven't been patient quite as many months as you but my H seems so content to continue things as they are.- in limboland - no papers filed.
Reading Michele's books gives me hope but I am having trouble finding any other solutions to our situation. Playing games and rocking the boat is not for me. My H and I have been separated over 7 months. It has effected my children and me tremendously - but we still want him back and become a family again. I know you want more from your W but it sounds as if you have quite a bit. She is still living in your house and is part of the family. I would love to have at least that.
Feeling stuck and being patient are so difficult when life continues - my children are growing up and their lives are so topsy turvy. Mine too. Stability is one of the things that caused my H to run. He wants to live life on the edge. For my children's sake I need to provide them with some stability and consistency.
So all I can say to you is decide what you and your children need and go for it. Your W will have to decide for herself - there is very little you can do to decide for her. Make changes for yourself - to better yourself and your life.
I still have hope for my situation but I have no expectations. I am living my life now as I think I need to and am doing my best to show my H unconditional love. (Right now he is stepping all over it.) But it is the only way I will feel good about my situation. Getting angry and feeling victimized just pushes my H away and makes me feel like a failure.
