I agree with you very much I do have a lot more to go through, getting through the actual D will be hell, I know that.
I know all about those monsters you mentioned. But the journey this far has taught me soooo much, and helped me face sooo many of them.
I really honestly have been doing soooo much better. I am proud of myself.
I will give it time, I will hold my tongue and fight the demons as much as I can. But I will not fight him about the D any longer. . . . I don't feel it's right. If he is miserable all this week . . . I simply see no point to put all four of us through that, I know the kids pick up on it too. I have been so up lately, the only thing that brings me down is him. I worry about him. I really do. It's not that D would stop me from worry about him, but it would just be a totally different worry, a totally different ballgame. I just don't know. I just . . . . I guess it needs time, and space, and I need to be still and watch what happens in the next few days.
I am trying to feed the good wolf Amy, I swear. I am trying to do what is best for an entire "family" I don't see where causing him more pain and misery suits any of us. I don't see any good in it. I am going to go along with whatever he wants for now. If he shows up tomorrow screaming DIVORCE, I will simply agree.
