Hi Everyone: Michelle, sorry to be back so soon, but need advice I had decided to back off communicating with ex husband after his last email that you and I discussed in earlier post. Anyway, on another forum there are other military spouses, young ones, who are very fightened about world events, and as a carreer military spouse, I knew I could be supportive to them and felt it was something positive I could do and decided to post to them. THe OW in my situation has been lurking on that site going on almost 4 yrs now, and ex has asked me not to post on there. I agreed to not post anything about him and me on there, which I had been complying with.It seems she checks everyday to see if I post, and has confronted him several times. I emailed him this am and explained the situation and stated I posted there over the weekend,butit was nothing that should be a problem for him. I also took the opportunity to tell him that I also was afraid about the current situation and the possible involvment of our sons who are both in the service. I told him it seems we can go out to lunch and talk about trivial things but when it comes to making an emotional connection, there is a wall that seems to go up when anything personal is brought up. I then closed by saying , if he was concerned about the boys, and wanted to talk he knew where I was. I tried to make it fairly light, non judgmental, and not like I was pursuing. I got an email back right before he left work tonight stating," I will try and respond more tomorrow,because things have been really hectic here. Post whatever you need to, but please DO NOT mention the lunches or phone conversations we have had the last few months." It seems from the response I got, he is more concerned about any reaction from OW, than he is about giving any emotional comfort to me, or having any major worries about his sons and expressing it to me.He seems to be more honest with me than he is with OW. I am going to wait for whatever further response he decides to send, but am at the point where I am ready to totally bow out. It seems his loyalty is with her from the response I received tonight. Concern about the boys seemed second. Anywords of wisdom?
