Thanks for the reply. To add more information. I was totally blind-sided by h in Jan., he had never even mentioned that he was unhappy, I felt uneasy, knew something wasn't quite right. He confessed to the affair, we went to counselor (who told him he wasn't depressed...)twice, I continued going, he didn't. He met the ow on a hunting trip out of town, she has since moved to a town 30 mi. away and I believe he spends most nights with her, but he has not introduced her to kids or community. He is avoiding conflict at all costs, he runs from friends and his sons because they have confronted him.
In the beginning I tried to convince him to stay for the sake of our kids and because we had invested 30 years together and they were great years.(imho) When I discovered that he bore no resemblence to the man I knew and the things coming out of his mouth made no sense, I wrote a "love must be tough" letter. I wrote several letters that looking back were great dbing tactics. I see him running away from conflict, from the responsiblity of family. I have always been the nurturer so I thought the 180 was to stop pursuing. For me to go dark was a big change, but I see no results. Should I just sit back and watch the MLC progress?
