Starting from scratch...

[StrongEnough]

Things here have YET to get one bit better. I would be lying if I said we were trying in earnest right now to repair this marriage. We struggled through so many years of our marriage trying to see "eye to eye" and meet each other's needs. We have been piecing for two years now. I do believe we are both tired on so many different levels.

As of late, we seem to be merely co-existing. We are co-parenting roommates.

I don't think I can do this anymore. I am at the end of my rope. I hate my life, I hate myself, I hate going days on end without being able to smile. More then anything, I want to change myself. I feel unable to do so while in this marriage. Somehow, H seems to make me feel like I am cornered and can't move or can't change. I can't do things to make me happy.

I am also tired of never bing right. No matter what I do, how I approach things, etc. it is never right even if it's exactly what he asked for.

Time to get back on my AD's and wait out the holiday season.