Aren’t you one of our buddies from the Great North East. Yea, hard to keep spirits up – the sun is coming up late and going down early – more dark than sun. But you know what, the leaves are changing – have you caught any of the color right outside your door. If not my bad…but…
Ahhhh, change.
So question for you, have YOU changed for the better or are you anchored? What is holding you back? Look, there is one thing I would LOVE to hear from my WAW and that simply is “I was wrong”. But I know too that it might never happen – UNLESS – I continue to live my life as if I am wringing EVERY ounce of life out of it. GAL anyone?
Really however, what is your goal? To me in these posts there is an undercurrent that you have taken upon yourself to change your H – you’re comparing him to the way he was. You know that you cannot however, don’t you? He has to make the change. And as a result, have you lost your way? Lost your sense of self and happiness? Well, you haven’t lost it – I think you gave it to H. Take it back!
What are SE’s goals? Where does SE want to be? What kind of R/M do you want? I think it is something more fulfilling than you have been getting for the past 4 years so I echo MMO’s sentiment of how much is too much. Look, I still don’t “endorse” D, and I am DB’g my butt off and will for the rest of my life. But I think what my WAW started to see is that person that is going for it (life that is) and not stopping and she needed to decide that she was along for the ride, but I also made it clear that I ain’t stoppin’. At the same time, I try to ensure that MY changes are permanent. That takes away opportunity for her to “blame”, finger point, whatever.
Anyway, last December I was right were you are and I decided that I was NOT going to be a slave to anybody when it comes to MY happiness. I’m always willing to share, but I won’t have it taken from me. That meant at the time completely letting to but as hard as it was, it has paid me back – regardless if my D stays busted or not.
So I ask one more time, what would make some of that sassy and beautiful person start to shine again? Now go get it….
Hope that helps somehow.
Sven
Never sacrifice the great for the good. Sometimes the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair.
