Michele, in last 3 wks, I read DB & 7 steps (Great books!!), talked w/ Arnold. I had a severe anger problem which is now completely resolved via God & my forgiving others (my thread in newcomers - So Scared Have I Lost Him). My H says he hates me due to years of verbal abuse (10 total, 1.5 married). In the midst of this I confirmed he's having a PA--happening for 1 month. I don't blame him 100% since I was barely civil (little talk, no affection or I love yous) to him in the last three months--he said if he'd felt loved it prob. wouldn't have happened. I'm willing to forgive the affair & work on us but he finds it hard to believe I've changed & won't hurt him again. DB says not to pursue but since our problems arose from coldness--can my 180 be love/pursuit? He seems to be seeking it--asked if I even cared if I lost him. Don't want to drive him further away...plus he says he is emotionally attached to OW at this point. Help! What techniques do I use? (Thanks!)
