Thanks for response Michelle.
I do realize that remarriage odds are low,as you have quoted the statistics, but I want to be in that minority. I want to also know that I did not leave one stone unturned. I wrote you a long time ago with the question of when is it time to give up, and you responded that it is an individual thing. Something in me keeps telling me not to give up yet, and I have to go with my instinct. I just can't let impatience and lack of impulse control take over. This is my time to put into practice all I have learned from you and others. So, here we go>>>>
My immediate goal is to keep our communication lines open and to go from casual light conversations to making emotional connections during our talks. I do know to get to that point will take some time, and has to be broken into small steps, which I will list. Please refine this and make corrections as you see fit.
Tomorrow is our lunch date, which means we will spend approx 1 1/2 hrs together. My plan:
Meet him with smile and friendly greeting
Mirror his posture
Keep conversation light and cheerful, kind of like when on first date. No arguing whatso ever!
Listen, listen, listen to what he says and watch for clues that will be of help to me
Watch his facial expressions and body language for signs of discomfort or boredom, and change subject immediately
Try to ask some open ended questions so there will be some actual conversation, rather than just yes and no answers., especially on subjects of his liking, such as golf, football, his work.
Compliment him on his appearnace.
Be the first one to end the lunch date, and thank him for the nice time.
And of course, act as if, everything in my life is fine.!

How will I know if things are progressing:
We will have pleasant time-there will be laughter and joking around
he will suggest another lunch date
We will talk about another subject besides children
Facial expressions and body language will provide clues that he is comfortable in my presence.
Possible quick hug goodby

Am I on track here with the techniquesas described in the book? Setting the goals is more difficult than I thought. I found myself being way to general, and have to learn how to make them more specific. However, I wanted to start with just one goal, but I do realize there are others that I must work on also.