Quote: He deferred it to me since I handle the finances. I said I would be happy to handle it if it was ok with him.
Correct me if I'm off base, but isn't this more of the same? In order for him to see you as a partner, he's going to have to be YOUR partner. And that means you make decisions together that concern both of you.
Mama, I did that for years and it came back to bite me in the butt. Even though he said he agreed to let me do something, he later recanted. He told me that it was easier to cave in rather than to argue with me. He then used those types of situations to illustrate how I had control and he had none--and guess who got the blame?
That's the type of position a sulky boy makes rather than a man. So don't allow him to set you up to be Mommy either. Make sense?
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsey, Point taken. I will go to the meeting but bring everything home to review with H before a decision is made. Is that ok or is that letting him off the hook as an equal partner?
Another thing, I made an appointment to get one of our dogs groomed today. H mentioned last night that since we are short on money he thought there were better things we could do with the $50, so instead of disregarding what he said and taking the dog in anyway (she badly needs a grooming btw) I am going to cancel the appt. Cool?
I don't know what kind of dog you have, but have you thought about doing it yourself? the first time my long-hair cat developed this massive clump of hair (he stopped grooming and the whole top of him was one hard chunck of hair, we thought he had a disease, the vet shaved him for us for 25$ or so)
The next time it happened I got myself a pet shaving kit and shaved him myself, wasn't too hard, just made sure I gave him his fav food and he didnt; get scared of the clippers. Just a thought.
aka >^ . . ^<
...but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
piecing after separation
Hi Twist, The dog that needs grooming is a golden retriever. I have actually been thinking about taking a scissors to her today to get rid of the long hair on her feet and removing some of the mats on her legs. She is a little hyper and doesn't sit well for a brushing so this will definitely be a challenge. Will let ya know how it goes.
Betsey