Quote: Although I have never ever done anything to make him mistrust me he feels that throughout our relationship I have been very controlling with our lives and money.
This is exactly the same viewpoint I see in my W. Her very nature is to direct (and minimize) the chaos, while I would much prefer to watch and redirect the occasional step that wanders too far afield. From random/scattered comments she is just trying to maintain some order in her life, while I stand back and wonder how long it will be until she again thinks to ask my opinion before announcing our next objective/task to the world. The ideal is probably somewhere between the two extremes, but that means I would have to take over and dominate her somehow, or she has to relinquish control (at least partially) of the children/surroundings/house. Both solutions are directly opposite the way we were raised.
On the other hand, dumping control of money into her lap has greatly reduced her spending sprees.
