When there are massive intimacy issues, MB is a much easier way to satisfy the male need for "release." As GEL says though, it is most likely not satisfying to your H, but it is just a way to get by.
Quote: He became much nicer and more attentive. We are getting along a lot better and he is so much more affectionate. He will get into bed and cuddle with me and kiss me and grab me but that is it. We kiss on the lips but very quick and simple kisses. Nothing passionate.
Those sound like good first steps, and very similar to my situation. During the infatuation stage, passion is very easy to acheive. This however can give us the mistaken impression that passion should be easy to acheive in the post-infatuation stages of a long-term R. I think everyone here on this board can testify to how hard it is to really acheive passion when there are underlying intimacy issues.
Quote: I am attractive and I get plenty of attention from other men so this is hard for me to understand.
Given that you are an attractive woman, I'm sure your H is attracted to you to some degree. But attraction doesn't automatically produce passion. Look at it from the dating perspective. If a woman found a man very attractive but is very shy, her physical responses to him could be easily misinterpreted by him as a lack of interest (or passion). I'm not saying your H is shy, but it is easy for other emotions to get in the way of passionate encounters.
Quote: cant men just close their eyes and have sex with anyone who is there
I'd venture to say that this is not the case for most men.
Quote: I want to tell him how I feel but everytime I try we argue.
Don't give up, don't stray from the point, don't let him deflect. This is VERY hard to do, and is something I am frankly horrible at doing. But unresolved arguments, especially serious ones, will kill any chance you have at intimacy.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
