So H spent a couple nights at the beach and got home in the middle of the day Thursday our baby's 1st b-day. He picked him up from MIL and I at lunch time and I let him know we were having a get together for sons b-day that night. He was ok with it until he found out his family was going to be there too at our house...where I'm living.

He thought we planned the whole thing without him...which it just kinda got thrown together and he was out of town...no one wanted to call him while we all knew what he was doing. He was all decked out in new clothes that he had bought at the outlets at the beach...new doc martin shoes, new shirt, new pants....the whole 9 yards. He looked good though He had never told me where he was going or that he was spending the night so he was a bit upset I think when I in a very round about way let him know that I knew where he was and that he was gone for the last couple days. I politely asked him if he had fun...if he got new shoes and asked him if he got them at the outlets. When it came to planning the get together I let him know that he was out of town for a couple days so that's why I hadn't let him know sooner. He was probably fumbling around in his brain trying to remember if he had told me and wondering what I know...etc.etc.etc.

Let me tell you...once again...it took every inch of me not to explode when I saw his new wardrobe. He had son in hand and was taking him for the rest of the day...I turned my shopping cart around and headed for the check out register. I was so flustered I almost lost it so I took a walk...good idea for sure. By the time he caught up with me with son I was more calm. He could tell I was flustered and helped me scan in my son's b-day present...a push buggy...which he loves by the way. He tried to initiate a nice conversation and I was nice back but just really wanted to escape...didn't show it of course. Then while we were having our conversation he found out his family was coming to my place instead of his...which he never planned anything in the first place...he got all sorts of mad...I was still nice and was trying to clarify a few things with get together and picking son up from him and he kept telling me "just leave, just leave." I let him know he was welcome to come over. Right away he called his mom to yell at her..."if MY family is going to get together they should be getting together at MY place." His mom called me of course since we tell eachother everything...just a little side note...sometimes that's not the best idea...causes more stress sometimes Love her honesty though.

H didn't show up at party...his whole family did and everyone kept asking "is H going to be here...where is he....why is he not here." MIL let FIL know that H doesn't want them to associate with me anymore....we all were not in aggreance on that as we all decided we aren't loosing eachother just because he isn't with me....that's a good thing.

After the get together I texted H a picture of S with blue all over his face from cake and said "daddy, do i have something on my face?" H texted back...WOW...did you here that...H texted back "I could pick him up at ur house at 7" which I was shocked at. I texted him "Ok, thanks that works great for me, I appreciate it, we all missed you being here, S was so funny, he's definately your son "

H was very pleasant next morning and stuck around until after I left...I think he went through some things in the garage after I left but I'm at the point that there are no material things that will get me that worked up. Didn't even ask what he was looking for...don't really care anyway. H brought S to me at lunch time and we went to Dairy Queen...he was very pleasant and I paid for our lunch since he had so many times in the past. He sat in the back seat with S and we visited a little about nothin. I picked S up at 5:30 at his apartment and he was a little interested in why I was feeding S in the car instead of his apartment but he didn't say much. He texted me Friday night from work wondering what size our S wears since his big b-day party was Saturday. I texted back with size and he texted back again saying "Thanks" and I texted "welcome. have a good night."

Saturday he called and wanted to know when I was setting up at the pizza parlor for S's b-day party so he could come help setup. He got there a few minutes early and helped with S so we could setup....party went great. My mom...keep in mind...was the first one to say that she wouldn't be at the party if H was there...gave him a big hug, kissed him on the cheek and told him she loved him. He hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek back...very unlike H. She told him "keep us in your thoughts" and he said he would. No one was mean to him and everyone was very nice and friendly. He bought the pizza and pop for 30-40 people and was very helpful in everything. He stayed afterward to help cleanup and get everything in my car. It was awesome...my H and I were in the same room with all of our friends and family and our S...what more could someone ask for. He put S in my car and S fell asleep in no time. I texted a picture of sleeping S to him and he texted back once again. At this point I'm very excited...he's texting me and being nice...SCORE!! I texted him letting him know I appreciated his help greatly and let him know everyone enjoyed themselves. He texted back saying thanks and he let me know he's getting his new cell phone in a week...he has been asking me about his cell phone a lot lately wondering when the contract is up since I just got a new phone.

So today I texted him another picture of S...this time he was crying in the pic. H called after a few minutes and was talking about money...wondering how much he had paid me this month and when I wanted the next money. He told me at the beginning of this month that he was getting his own car insurance and then he throws in that he is going to check a couple insurance companies but he may stay on our plan until things are finalised...something about a discount....I don't know...you got me...I could guess what he was getting at...but in all reality...think it was some kind of excuse not to change out of our car insurance. Did I mention he still hasn't changed his address at the post office to get his mail to go to his address and that he changed his checking account to his address instead of OW's. He has also been mentioning all week how he needs to get his washer and dryer working when I'm almost positive he's been doing his laundry at OW's apartment. So he now has a functional washer and dryer and is officially doing his laundry at his own place. Another big SCORE...he's changing things away from her and still hesistating slightly to change things away from me...BIG plus.

Everyone keeps telling me..."he is just so confused...none of this makes sense...he's a good guy...what's going on...why won't he just come home??" I keep letting them and myself know this is a process...not a quick or easy one by any means. I still think he's trying to shield himself and me to anymore hope or hurt. We've been getting along so good and texting and then he throws out the "until things are finalised." I think it was just to let me know again that he's not planning anything soon...don't get your hopes up.

He's picking S up in the morning around 7 and then I'll see him at lunch and after work so I'll probably have something to report tomorrow night...I've just been so crazy busy and exhausted from everything I haven't had a chance to post...thanks to everyone checking in on me...specially ForPeanut.

Let me know if you have any insight on the new behavior.