The hurt and pain was so vivid again this weekend. I have been doing so good but the tears flowed the last two days as the affair turned into a family fued. My Hs grandpa died four days ago and so his 2 brothers and families flew in from out of state.
My MIL who I'm best friends with road up to the airport with my H on Saturday to get the oldest brother and OW got brought up a few times and it all went downhill from there. My MIL told H that she never wanted to meet OW and hated her...my Hs defense was "how could you say that you don't even know her" MIL said "I don't care who she is or how nice she is I NEVER want to meet her." H was perterbed at the thought and MIL made a few other things clear to H and of course he was outraged.
They got to the airport and H was very grumpy at this point. My MIL told brother and his W that H is not very happy with her right now....naturally they asked "Why?" H piped up and said because mom wants to kill OW...which she was angry but obviously not really planning on killing OW. Brother's W told MIL that she needs to support her son in his affair and MIL replied saying "OK when your H has an affair on you I'll support him." H said "Whatever, that didn't happen until after she kicked me out." I kicked him out before I read the Divorce Remedy and know that wasn't the best option now. The day I kicked him out I had suspicions he was having an affair and he told me that he's wasn't sure if he loved me and wanted to be with me anymore.
So everything went from there. SIL likes to get in the middle of things and intentionally cause problems. It is very sad and I know before she leaves Wednesday she is going to make a point to meet OW so she can tell H's family how cute, nice, etc. OW is. I am completely disturbed, frustrated, sad, angry...you name it. Best part is that H's grandpa's funeral is on Tuesday and I'm going to be there...with all of them even psycho SIL who is nice to my face but supports Hs affair when I'm not around.
H's dad called me today and is very disturbed and sad at this entire situation and invited me over to visit with the whole family. I feel like an outcast but love to visit with my neice and nephew I never get to see.
Should I stay out of the picture when it comes to H's family? I have been in the family for 8 years now...since I was 16. This is all just not fair!! My H acts like he can't be happy if I'm in the vacinity but I'm still exceptionally nice to him and am always happy around him. I'm curious as to why if he's the one having the affair why he's the one who's depressed and grumpy. Why am I the one who's happy. H also told MIL that "he doesn't know how him and OW get along because she is so conservative." As she's having an affair and he's out drinking and smoking weed....that's messed up if you ask me....recipe for disaster.
Tomorrow I'm going with non-psycho SIL to get the grandbabies pictures taken. H's mom and dad are going too...don't know if H is going to be there or not....don't really care either, I'll be nice if he is there. I'm also having a get together on Thursday S1 b-day and don't know if H is planning on attending. H is planning on attending big B-day party on Saturday at the pizza parlor.
H told his mom that she is no longer welcome at his apartment and they only have a relationship because of S1. MIL told him "I guess that's your choice."
I need some heavy duty encouragement to continue DB with the situation I'm in right now....I'm very stressed and discouraged right now and am having problems concentrating.
