I think your feelings are natural. All of us that find us in this situation and at times feel like failures. We wonder how we got ourselves in this position and all of our past mistakes. Sometimes we are so hurting including our spouse that we forget all of the good we had in our past life and only remember the bad times.

I know it is hard to forget and get past these things especially when it is plainly evident that our spouse is still holding these past hurts fresh and foremost in their mind...but all you can do is be a better man now and hope the past eventually does drift into the past and the current good intentions replace those negative feelings.

I feel like I am heading for the exact same territory and I think my wife is going to stay for now...but your post hit home because now I know I have a lot of work in front of me...

"Friendship is like peeing your pants: everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth."