The Little Black Book

[cat03]

H got tested, still wating 4 results though nurse told him if he'd got the usual STDs it would've shown by now.

Well, screwed things up royally this weekend. We only had one night together 'cause of training, was expecting sex, he was too tired, ended having a midnight "talk" abour how I get no affection, how i get no compliments from him- from everyone else but from him-and how he thought OP was beautiful, about how his sex drive was up the roof before and w/OP now he is too tired, etc etc.

I'm pretty sure my PMS didnt' help, I just let out all I read on the fated book. He told me how I shouldn't take all I read as gospel, that those were his feelings at that time and that it is in the past he is trying to forget. How everyweek "there is something" I bring up.

Yes, I shouldn't have gotten all emotional and I do know this week was specially physically trying on him, I'm just trying to understand that for now his sex drive is different, the circumstances are different and I can't expect so much, I know I know, he told me I"m just pushing him away w/ all this.

Well, at least he did understand about how a hug and him initiating little affection gestures makes a huge difference for me. He thought it was showing affection (or something, closeness) when he just sits there next to me when we watch out sat. night movie. He did say he'd try to be more attentive.

I'll do better this next weekend, I promise. He did make it up in the morn though , I wasn't expecting anything after my tantrum the night before.

I read this on another thread and it is something he said, I can't get hung up on every little thing he does or does not do, it is supposed to be trying as it is to see each other only 2 days a week, so I have to be more understanding and patient, I know this training is draining and it is particularly hard on him.