Nothing new to report here. I haven't bargained like that with God yet. I've prayed that Kev gets his head straightened out and that he ends up happy.
Well . . . maybe I'll have something to say later. I'm still up in the air about the custody. I want to have my bases covered. But if I wait for him to file the custody thing I think we all know how long that could take, and since I have the girls there's really not much to worry about.
Emily! You go girl. That's right. Just let it roll... I doubt very much he'll ask for custody, anyway. And doubt even more any judge would give it to him, if he actually had the b*lls to ask for it.
You sound great!!! Keep on this track. You deserve more! And this is the way to getting it.
May it be eternal while it lasts.
My sitch
Me: 36
H:34
M: 5 years
Bomb: 03/14/06
My H is still keeping his address here. He will be home again in two weeks (the weekend of the 14) He's NOT making ANY sense. What do I make of all of this? I just don't want to fall back into the "trap" . . . . I just wish I could know if he's trying to work through his feelings or if this is some new way of using me!?!?!?! Any thoughts?
Until he changes his address again (which he says he isn't) they route him through and tell him where he has to park. I can tell him he can't stay at my house but he's still "stuck" in town until he goes back out on the road.
He's sending me such completely mixed signals. . . I just don't understand him at all anymore. He tells me he's talked to her. Then he says something about wanting me to beat her up. He says he had a great time here on Thursday. He said something about having "my" sweatshirt and so he "has to come again" . . . .
I just don't get it. Not at all. I asked him about changing his profile back to "in a relationship" His reply? . . . "I thought you wanted to start back at the begining and work our way back up." I wanted to scream BULLSHIT at him . . but resisted. He's says he's not with her. . . and is working on it with me.
I don't know if I want to "work" on it anymore. I'm so confused by him. I don't want to give up . . . if this is just God testing my faith again . . . But I don't want to go down the wrong path.
I agree with Amy. You do NOT need him to survive, that you will do yourself; you don't need to get love and affection from him- you can get that from your children; you do not need him to help you to be a worthwhile person. You always were and always will be. Give 'em the boot, girl. There are more out there, so I hear. Your H is immature (just like my 43 yr old) and does not deserve the privilege of being called your husband nor does he make much of a role model for your children in the state he is in. I also say cut him loose- you don't need this B***sh*t. None of us do... And another thing-he needs to find another place to stay when he is in town. You owe him NOTHING, not a roof over his muddled little head or the frayed corner of a blanket to sleep under every few weeks when he decides to drop back into your life overnight.
Emily, you can do whatever you need to without this man who has become a boulder tied to your leg. Have you started working on your business plan for your grooming business yet? There are some great sites out there with free business plan formats.I used one years ago for a business class faux business plan I had to create. The plans are not considered always necessary for every type of business, but I learned how helpful they can be in projecting income, growth, expenditures and those kinds of things. This could be a great diversion for you that will only have positive effects your life. I remember reading that some people put together plans years before ever intending to act upon them. Get on with YOUR life. If he comes back once you've successfully done that you'll be in a much better place to consider whether he is worthy of your time.
That said- I know how much easier it is to say than to do sometimes, hence my appearance on this board several months ago. My H is on the way out the door, too and it breaks my heart. I,however; will not succumb to the depression, denial, anger, yada-yada( well maybe the anger for a little while longer...). Experience them, I have and will but I'm trying hard to find the positives in this sitch and build up from them. I think that all of us here can do this and must in order to save ourselves, first in baby steps and then hopefully in leaps and bounds.All is possible through the grace of God.
Amy, at this point I'd give one of my H's nuts in hopes that maybe without the weight he'd be able to get himself back into balance again. I rather doubt that at this point,though.I wonder if he'd even notice that it is gone since it must be very hard to see when one has one's head so incredibly far up his ***. The visualizations do make me smile, I'll admit. And they say that Virginia is for lovers... I'm in Northwestern VA, where are you?